.... random rants and rambles. no agenda. yet.

The scene: Our kitchen, just now. Doorbell rings.

C: There's someone at the door. [goes to front door, opens it]

Through the glass door, I can make out three people on the doorstep; one of whom is wearing a weird bib thing (think netball) with "NDCS" on it. I bid a hasty retreat to the back garden to throw breadcrumbs out for the birds. A minute later, C appears.

Me: I know who it is and I'm not doing it.

C: Oh, come on. Just meet them. I told them I have someone I'd like them to meet...

Me: I don't want to! You can't make me!

C: Oh come on.

Me: No!

C: GO!

I go into the hall, to find NDCS Bib Man stroking Harrythedog who is lying across the doorway, with two very smart looking women standing behind.

Bib Man: SaysomethingbutIhavenoideawhatblahblah.

Me: [pointing to bib] Can't you sign?

Bib Man: [going red] Er, no.

Me: Can you?

Woman 1: No.

Me: Can you?

Woman 2: Er, no.

Me: [voiced over by C] You work for the NDCS and you can't sign? Shame on you!

Bib Man: [redder] Well, I've only been working for them for three weeks.

Me: [voiced over by C] Oh, plenty of time to learn then!

Bib Man: Er, yeah. Um, have you had any services from the NDCS recently?

Me: [voiced over by C] Um, not lately. I'm 33!

Bib Man: No?!

Me: Oh yes.

C: I don't think there's much you can tell us about the NDCS that we don't know already.

Bib Man: Well. Bye then!

[they leave]

Me: And now they're going to tell our neighbours all about deaf children.

C: Well I hope they don't think it's because of you!

Me: Did he really not believe I'm 33?!

C: No!

Posted by j at 7:35 PM | Permalink | Comments (3)

Am I glad it's the weekend? Very glad. I'm especially glad because me and C spent a lot of last weekend Doing Things, and this weekend the only thing we're doing is going to see this play, which should be quite exciting, partly because I've never seen subtitled theatre before.

I digress. One of the things we Did last weekend was spend a lot of time skidding about in the mud picking up loads of rubbish that stupid people had thrown all over the nice countryside. No, we didn't lose our minds, we joined in our local Clean Up thingy, along with quite a lot of other people who agree that people who throw rubbish all over the countryside are stupid. Me and C were lucky enough (!) to get a whole patch of our own at the bottom of a slope, which looked like this when we started:

Well, actually, that's only about 20% of it all. And that bike was HEAVY, but kind of useful, as I used it as a kind of pick to jam into the ground and hang onto when I was skidding back up the slope again. No idea if that made sense, but it's what I did. Oh, and the speaker (the black box thing in the photo) was EXTRA HEAVY, and kind of fell apart on the way up the slope, taking me back down with it about 3 times.

Which brings me to ask: WHY go to all the bother of dragging a really, really heavy professional DJ's speaker along a countryside path and then pushing it down a slope, where it stays for a few years before some stupid person (i.e. me) comes along and almost breaks her leg dragging it back up and sticking it in a skip? Seriously... why?!

People are weird.

But that's not the weirdest thing we found... there were several bikes, a fridge, a mouldy old dartboard, a cooker, a sewing machine, millions of cans and crisp packets and God knows what else, all strewn across the countryside. And. That. Makes. Me. Mad.

Here's some of the evidence:

And when we had finished our patch, it looked like this:

I can't tell you how satisfying that was. Like I said, people are weird.

Posted by j at 5:27 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)

This evening, Brian decided to move in, for reasons known only to himself. He is showing no desire to leave. Kind of like a sit-in. And yes, Harrythecat looks furious. Mind you, Harrythecat's default expression is furious.

Oh dear.

Posted by j at 7:32 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)

I am just sorry that I missed this. What does it mean?!

Is it art? That is the question!

Posted by j at 12:58 PM | Permalink | Comments (3)

... but HOW CUTE IS THIS?!

OMG. CUTE!!

Yessss, I've subbed to icanhascheezburger.com. And noooo, I wasn't interested in it until I became a Crazy Cat Lady In Training.

However! Lest anyone thinks I have gone all soft in my old age, I had better point out that THIS is my favourite one so far:

Quite amazing innit, the resemblance?

Posted by j at 8:55 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

If you haven't tried purple sprouting broccoli, TRY SOME NOW, before it goes out of season.

I'd always eyed it with mild suspicion until recently, because, well, it looks kind of weird and isn't broccoli meant to be GREEN anyway?! But then we switched to the farmer's market rather than getting an organic veg box when we moved here, and the farmer always has tons of the stuff, so I have been brave and tried it and decided that I LOVE IT. Seriously, it's fantastic. And yes, you're meant to eat the leaves too, which means much less faffing about.

I can't quite believe I'm sitting here raving about how wonderful a vegetable is, but seemingly, I am. And I am very sad that it's going out of season soon.

So, do not let the humble purple sprouting broccoli remain ignored!

Posted by j at 6:50 PM | Permalink | Comments (4)

Tip Warning of the day:

If you start using an extra monitor with your laptop while your PC is being fixed by the nice people down the hill, please be aware that you will never, ever like using one monitor again. In fact, a solitary screen will seem so inadequate that, in effect, you will feel like someone has sawn your entire desk in half for a laugh.

Then, when your PC comes back from the nice people down the hill, you will leave it in its box for over a week until you get round to buying a second monitor so that you can carry on with your new dual monitor habit obsession.

You have been told!

Posted by j at 4:51 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

It's snowing...

... and this weekend, C and I are way too knackered to do anything or go anywhere (that's what overtime does to you when you're our age!) so we decided to stay home and grow things.

OK, to be more exact, we've planted things rather than grown them, because that's the part you have to do first. So, yeah, our newly chitted seed potatoes are planted, but we had to keep bringing them in because of the snow, so we've kind of given up and they're in the utility room for now until it looks more like April again.

Along with the potatoes, we've planted tomatoes, sweetpeas and various other flowers, mushrooms, crystals and, er, an envelope. But it's no ordinary envelope - after all, how could A possibly consider giving me a birthday card in an ORDINARY envelope?! - it's a special Florelope made from sheep's poo and seeds (only in Wales!) and if we water it and everything, it'll turn into flowers! O-K-K-K-K.

Sooooooo... in the absence of any instructions, said envelope was optimistically ripped into several pieces:

... and then arranged as so:

... then covered in compost.

Now this is the part where we cross our fingers and hope for the best, at the same time as feeling slightly suspicious that this is all a con and well, who plants envelopes?! Er, us.

A's Dad, ever the cynic, thinks they'll come up as dandelions, but I'm secretly hoping for something like the ones on our kitchen table at the moment:

Who knows?

Posted by j at 4:45 PM | Permalink | Comments (5)

The Dog, being the territorial creature he is, defended The Office doorway stubbornly. No was was he going to let The Cat in. In fact, The Cat could disappear forevermore, for all he cared; such an annoying animal it was. And anyway, The Dog felt strongly that The Office was his, because The People in it were to be defended at all times, including from The Cat.

Especially The Cat.

So there he stood, guarding the doorway to The Office and its inhabitants, growling softly. And there he stayed, until one of The People told him to stop being a horrible bully and leave The Cat alone.

And The Cat celebrated - as usual - by stalking annoyingly past The Dog and settling down for another day on The Dog's bed.

The Dog gave up. Again.

Posted by j at 12:08 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)